Some things are simply outside of your control

There are things which are within our power, and there are things which are beyond our power. – Epictetus, Enchiridion

When we think about Nature we tend to immediately recognize that some things are simply outside of our control. The weather can turn, an earthquake can strike and a volcano could erupt and we would never be upset at ourselves for failing to prevent a storm from occurring. I mean, Nature is just being Nature after all.

How strange, that we are not nearly as kind with chance in our daily lives. I think that’s a shame. There are many things in our lives that we cannot control and it would do us well to remember to treat ourselves and others kindly when we experience them.

Traffic, power blackouts and internet outages are just a few examples of modern inconveniences which remain outside of our control, and still we often allow these things to disrupt our peace of mind.

What good does it do to stress and complain about the things you cannot change? Just as you cannot change the traffic, you also cannot change the opinions of others. So, why bother being upset about these things?

This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t make the best plans possible in our lives, but it does mean we shouldn’t be upset when things don’t go according to that plan. Nature is unpredictable after all, and therefore our lives are clearly subject to change without notice.

So, be kind and patient. Make it your goal to endure wisely the situations you cannot change. Don’t become another misanthrope or an angry voice. Nobody needs another annoyance added to their lives. Take care that you never become one.

What Should We Value?

How many things are superfluous we fail to realize until they begin to be wanting; we merely used them not because we needed them but because we had them. And how much do we acquire simply because our neighbours have acquired such things, or because most men possess them!

Seneca

I think we fail to realize how many of our possessions are really pretty extraneous. Our parents and grandparents enjoyed their youth and middle years without many of the conveniences we enjoy today—cellphones, the internet, on demand streaming services, endless varieties of food, Amazon, Google, and now everything is available for delivery straight to your home—the list goes on for quite some time. The point is if we were born in a different era all of these things obviously wouldn’t have mattered. None of them were necessary for our parents to enjoy life and find their place in the world. So, why do you allow them to matter to you?

Have you ever noticed how at one moment we can be enjoying our latest purchase and telling our friends all about some new feature and two minutes later we can suddenly be overwhelmed when we discover something doesn’t go as we planned. Maybe our credit card won’t scan correctly at the checkout line or perhaps we find a ding in our new car’s door. The truth is that many of the things we let exasperate us don’t really matter on their own when we separate what happened from how it impacted our plans.

We’ve given these objects the power to upset us because we lost track of what’s really valuable. We stopped looking for value in ourselves and now we’re left with an unsatisfiable desire for something “more” that can’t be fulfilled by the material world. So, we ignore our feelings and go on buying “more stuff” and being disappointed when everything doesn’t turn out the way we wanted.

The truth is that there is nothing inherently wrong with enjoying the conveniences and luxuries of the modern world. I mean we all understand that an object can’t be good or bad. An object is just an object after all. It’s a collection of molecules arranged by nature and tempered by men to serve a purpose—nothing more. So we have to look at how we value and use those objects that determines if our decisions add value or inhibit our personal growth and development.

Is our sense of purpose and fulfillment really something we can measure and buy? Why do you work all day—every week—for decades? Is it to afford the latest fashions and gadgets or are you searching for your place in this world? We all have bills to pay, but are we working just to pay those bills or do we use our careers and salaries to help us fulfill a deeper human purpose? I think that’s the unspoken struggle we face. Objects and possessions are tools. How are you using yours? Are you using your resources to improve your mind or to distract it?

Fear is Self-imposed Torture

He who indulges in empty fears earns himself real fears.

Seneca

Our thoughts influence how we interpret the world. Napoleon Hill enthusiastically championed the belief that our thoughts were powerful embodiments of our conscious energy. That energy could propel us to new heights as a source of inspiration or it could just as easily hold us back under the weight of our unrestrained fears.

Thoughts mixed with a definiteness of purpose, persistence, and a burning desire are powerful things.

Napoleon Hill

We often trap ourselves in cycles of self-fulfilling prophecies of doom when we spend too much time in our own heads reflecting on everything that is beyond our limited circle of control. If we focus all of our attention on our difficulties, pain, and the obstacles in our way, it won’t be long before that’s all we’ll see in the world.

We end up conditioning ourselves to stop looking for opportunities and solutions to our problems because we erroneously believe that no matter what we do, we’re never going to succeed. We sabotage our chances of success before we even face the next problem. Opportunities soon pass us by unnoticed because we stopped looking for them.

We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more from imagination than from reality.

Seneca

This is a “Do Nothing—Fail at Nothing” mind trap. We can’t let fear hold us back. When we find ourselves in these trying moments, we can reflect on the famed 1988 Nike slogan for some inspiration.

JUST DO IT.

Nike Slogan (1988-Present)

It’s a fitting motto for a company named after the the Greek Goddess of Victory (Nike). So, I like to play with those words and their relationship and think of the maxim as the formula for victory.

Success = Just do it.

Don’t give up. Struggle on. Do something. Keep moving, and eventually we’ll find another opportunity waiting for us.